C h a p t e r  II.   T h e  w o r l d  w i t h o u t  s u c h - n e s s.

From Igor Kalinauskas book "Games of I"
Translation by I. Shpigelman and B. Macdonald, 2006

There are two co-measurable worlds - the world of subjective reality of a man and the world of objective reality. A man as self-consciousness, as self hood, is given to himself as a borderline creature. On one side of this self hood lies the objective reality, on the other side, subjective.

The common intellectual premise of European culture is that a man is turned toward objective reality by his consciousness, his intellect and his intellectual energy. Creating one or another description of the objective reality, we establish this or other intellectual premise toward everything that is objective reality for us. But one place is almost always excluded from it. This place is ourselves as fragment of objective reality. It happens because this place the place of "I" does not yield to the light of consciousness or intellect. It is occupied, we stand in there, and, from it, look upon everything else.

Body - a fragment of objective reality

And when we stand in this place, we perceive ourselves as an object, the symbol of this object is our physical body, and this is why our attitude toward our body is either magical (body is God), or conceptual (every part of the body has its place and meaning in our Self-concept). On one hand, our consciousness easily accepts the fact that the body is a fragment of the objective reality that exists in the nature, in the reality, and, as such, the body is dissipated in it. But we cannot perceive this dissipation because we are compelled to single out ourselves as a fragment of objective reality into something separate. And it so happens that we perceive ourselves (and not only our body) as an object.

In order to see oneself, a man shifts his view into objective reality, and looks upon oneself from the side. From there he conceives oneself as a thing, as an object, as a part of objective reality again. This state of affairs creates a certain intellectual uneasiness, our consciousness cannot agree with the statement that Self is only an object, and starts playing various intellectual games.

For instance, the human body is likened to the Cosmos, the reality as is, and we end up with the Cosmos in the Cosmos. All these games have one objective - to remove an intellectual flaw that tells us: "I see myself only from the outside". I see myself as an object, as a fragment of objective reality, because when I look "from inside", then: "I see only the boundaries of the subjective reality".

Further, when a man "looks" on his subjective reality, that is on the volume of experience, sensations, thoughts, feelings, he discovers that in his so called subjective reality not everything is subjective. There exist quite a few things that are independent of him, that cannot be managed, that cannot be controlled. These things live by the laws that are located outside of this man, and, so, they belong to objective reality again. To resolve this contradiction, subjective reality is reduced to the space of imagination only. Thus the place is created - the personal space of subjective reality, where one can day-dream, invent, create ideas and combine all of it in any manner, sleeping or waking. And it seems to the man, that all of it is under his control, that all of it is his very own, all of it is "I".

The contradiction between the desire of man to attach the highest price tag to his subjective reality, to give it its greatest significance, to be pure subject - unique and inimitable, and at the same time the necessity of thinking of oneself as objectively existent, is the cause of all limitations placed on our capabilities of comprehension and of transformation.

Division of the World

We just cannot get rid of this thing under the name of "I". In the spiritual traditions there exists the knowledge that "I" is a speckle on the flow of reality. With such a stand taken by our consciousness, division of reality on its subjective and objective halves loses its meaning. For a man, whose self-identity is defined by a simple assertion I am there is no need for such division, because both subjective and objective is equally infinite to him.

Division of the World on subjective and objective do not gain us anything except a highly magical regard toward a man, as a certain enigmatic object of creation along with the illusion that everything is cognizable, but the man, or, everything is not cognizable, only the man is. The fear of the young creature called Homo Sapience of the World around him is still strong, and this is why he needs "I as a thing" in order to think of himself. He is incapable of thinking about himself as of anything but a thing, an object. This incapability, of course, causes anxiety and panic. Anxiety and panic strengthen the such-ness (for example, a fixed image of oneself), not as some abstraction, but rather as a concise specification with rigidly fixed parameters.

Such a state of affairs reduces psychology to a mere depiction of objects that do not want to open up and show what is inside them. Therefore, psychology prefers to represent a human as a "black box", attempting to comprehend his inner world by comparison of the information on the "inputs" of the box with the reactions on the "outputs"; or, by observing how one "black box" reacts on the presence of another "black box". And we end up with the psychology of things that are only tagged as "humans".

How to become reality

In order to make the first step toward one's own reality, in order to become reality, in order to get rid of any teaching and of any teacher, one must first get rid of oneself as an object. To get rid within oneself, that is to stop using this method of thinking of self, not only speaking, but even thinking in terms of object, e.g. "I must have such thing as `I"'.

But in which way then is one supposed to think of self? In no way at all. By its very nature, self-consciousness is null and void. The ultimate self-identity in the realm of self-consciousness is contained in the simple statement I am, I exist, I am I. These three assertions, I am, I exist, I am I are sufficient. There is not anything else that one needs to think of self. This is precisely what we call being in the World. You do not think of yourself, You are. What is there to think, really? I am I, I am. That is it. What's more?

Incarnation

When "I" is just "I", then one may think of his incarnation. Not of oneself, but of one's own incarnation, for example, of what lies outside of oneself, outside of pure self.

The world indeed appear as a whole, since a separate thing named "I" is no longer found in there, that is, of course if we do not count zero as a thing. Subjective - objective, mine - not mine, yours - mine divisions are not relevant any longer, since there exists only the incarnation of this Spirit, the specific incarnation of my "I" as part of the World. In such circumstances there is a moment when this incarnation can be actually seen (that is, the life of the body, the life of the psyche and the life of the consciousness).

Spiritual Path is the path toward the Spirit, but path to the Spirit is the path to oneself, to one's own pure, subjectiveness: I am I, I am. And everything else is the rest: the content of the consciousness, psyche, body, relationships, personal history. This partitioning on pure subject and incarnation may be called by some mystical term, but it also may be called liberation of one's fears of the World. So now we have a clear, not clouded, free and joyful look upon reality, because there is no sense to look "upon oneself" - void is always void, anywhere.

One cannot see void as thing, or as idea, or as thought, one simply cannot see zero. One cannot think of void, or imagine void - but one does not need to, either. And then all the mystifications disappear, because there is no longer such "sacramental" object as "I". And since there is no "sacramental" object, there is no need for mystifications, because they where needed only for one thing - to justify the existence among all of the Universe of one and only one singled out of reality object - myself.

The alternative is simple. Either: as soon as you remove this special object, that, for whatever reason was singled out of reality, all grounds for mystification are lost, there is no longer a need to fool oneself. Or: as soon as this "sacramental" object appears, one needs to delude oneself, because an excuse is required. One must excuse oneself for thinking that everything is not sacramental, but this one thing is sacramental; everything else is plain: a tree, a thunderstorm, a cat, a table, a star, planets, Solar System, galaxy - plain, Vasia, Petia, Dusia, Musia - also plain, but whenever I myself - nothing plain remains, and the mystification starts.

But wait a moment! Our intellect, it is also a part of reality. And it will resist this hoax. It cannot just accept that this thing, this object, this widget of That's Me, I'm Such, is being taken out of the equation of the universe.

So, what are you? Well, I am such and such, with such type of informational metabolism, with such a biography, with such disposition, with such abilities, I have such thing here and such thing there, do not touch me here, and do not push me there, but caress me here, and scratch there, so that everyone would know: "I am Such" and all the World is not. But when all the barriers of such-ness are brought down, this is when the true love to oneself appears.

How one can avoid loving oneself if I am I, I am? What kind of claim one could possibly put in to this amazing creature? Pure subject, without any "objectivity" - pure Spirit? How could you not to love Spirit? And when you love this I am I to such extent that nothing else is needed for self-identity, then your late such-ness will greet you as your incarnation.

A man makes an inner psychological endeavor, he accepts this stand: I and my incarnation. And now he feels good, because there is no need to think of oneself, because there is nothing to think of. There is no need to watch oneself, because you will not see a thing. So, now he can look straight to the World, and see what used to be called "myself" as part of this World.

"I" in reality

So where is this "I"? "I" that exists, where is it located? In the reality, where else. Trivial logic, common sense. But then, if the reality is occupied by this pure spiritual formation called I am I, I am, then, in the same reality, other pure spiritual formations may exist, and all that may be said about them is that they exist and that they are. And now the concepts of a "second plane of reality, the plane where immaterial entities may exist, and the third plane - the plane of pure Spirit" suddenly start shaping out into something tangible.

There is only one problem - one must accumulate enough courage and common sense. That's it. And when we apply common sense we understand that Spirit simply cannot have dilemmas of life and death, good and bad, and so on.

Certainly, there may be a desire to become pure Spirit, that is, to fade into the pure Spirit. But the nature of reality is such that it is Incarnating Spirit. This incarnating Spirit is the reality. If there hadn't been incarnating Spirit, there wouldn't be anything to talk about, look at, think of, dream of. As there would be no reality, no object for our self-consciousness.

This is the nature of reality - embodiment, incarnation. Accepting this for a fact, we can talk about the power of incarnation, of increment and decrement. And for building such a view of the World, an "enchanted" object, something that does not belong there, something that does not comply with the commands of reality, is taken out of reality. No enchantment is needed now, since our incarnation does comply with all the commands of reality. What else is there to comply with? But also, the reality will comply with our commands as well, to the extent of power of our incarnation.

From the world of things into the world of processes

The world of things is disappearing, only the process of incarnation remains, the World of processes. The reality is processual. The incarnation as a whole consists of something, something all the time appears and disappears, appears and disappears. And I won't even mention the absolute emptiness around, and just some amount of matter dangling in this emptiness. So, in this permeable, virtual, processual world, the pure spirit under the name of "I", is there anything that he cannot do, if he is pure? Try to prove me wrong, at least in theory, that he cannot do some things in such a world, because all practical examples to prove the limitations of pure Spirit will only prove one's own inability to control his incarnation.

Who you think you are and who you are

Until a man gets rid of such-ness, he is not transparent for the Light, he still lives in the world of sorrow, day-dreams, tears, in the world of things where each and every thing keeps bumping into each other.

There is no chance to whisk from the world of things into the World of reality, where the reality is processual and a permeable for the Light. Perception of oneself as of thing named "this is me" will constantly obstruct the view of such a World. And it will not be possible to love the reality as is, because there would be nothing to love, there would be no reality, only the objective, that is hostile to subjective. And it will not be possible to love oneself, either, because this "oneself" is imperfect as anything explicit, as any thing. And others cannot be loved, they consume the space. From the standpoint of such-ness reality cannot be loved, because it is Different, in relation to me as a thing. And, of course reality is hostile toward this thing. "Love enemy of thine - love thou the reality."

The choice is quite simple. The choice is between what you think you are, and what you are. Do you want to abandon fear for the sake of joy, love, endless bliss and many other things about which you so much like to read in books?

If you want, and you can, then you will have very different questions, different thoughts, different problems and different tasks. Because then, instead of the "magical" thing under the name of I am such, you will have a very real gadget under the name of My incarnation. My incarnation as reality and incarnation of Other as reality.

How do we live without thinking of ourselves? This is the main practical question that must be solved in order to perceive the richness of life. Because to think of oneself is to think of a thing, not of the Spirit. There is a consistent pattern: stop thinking of yourself and you appear, start thinking - and you disappear. You disappear behind the covers, behind the weeping, darkened, dusty glass of your such-ness, you no longer exist for reality as her lover, and the reality no longer exists as your lover. It is possible to stop thinking of oneself, and, instead, to think or one's own: one's incarnation, one's relations with other people, one's relations with the world. And then your "I" will take the active stand toward your life.

When a men stops thinking of oneself, his consciousness calms down. He is clear indeed, and he obtains clear vision (clairvoyance) and clair-thinking, and clair-sensing. One can feel, sense, perceive, or simply be and not to do anything. Billions upon billions, an infinite number of vista, but for one obstacle - "I am such". Until this plug is not knocked out - nothing will have happened, because there stands a shade, between the light and the lit. Almost an impenetrable shade, sometimes. And as soon as you take this shade away, everything is alight, you see everything, because it is your own light, because you are the source of it.

And even when we say: "I am just a speckle on the flow" - we are still thinking of ourselves.

Therefore it is said: "Everything is a game, except for the Holy Spirit."

Not to think of oneself. It means that you used to think of yourself well, if you are able to stop now. You have completed the journey from such-ness to a true Self. All spiritual Paths, of all Traditions, without an exception, all of them end here. All as one, because there is nowhere to go from here, and no reason. This is the true end of all ways.

"I" playing with Me

To liken man to the macrocosm is a trick, rooted in ancient times. The question is what is it made for?

If it is made in order to boost one's self-esteem, and, by doing so to lessen the tension between the scale of the man and the scale of the Universe - this is one case.

If it is made in order to get attention to a peculiar ability of a man - to reflect the whole of the Universe by oneself - it is another case.

And, perhaps, the most difficult case is the one, where it is made in order to point out a unique state, a unique quality of inter-relationship between MAN and Universe, namely the possibility of the dialog between the two. The infinitude of the objective and the infinitude of the subjective penetrate each other in this dialog, the boundary between them becomes transparent. This transparency, this transfusion opens up a very different quality in the relations between Man and Universe.

What is this quality? When thinking of it, we first of all recall the stories and fairy tales of power, of supernatural capabilities. But, as it is well known, the idea of unbounded capabilities - it is the idea of death. For even death itself is bound. Anything that exists is bound. Therefore, I think, we are talking here of something else, namely, of a unique ability of Man to enter into a relationship with the World on the level of dialog, on the level of partnership. One should do it not for feeling oneself somehow equal to the World, but in order to conquer, to overcome the terrifying fear that lives in the depth of our consciousness, the fear of the Nature, the fear of its might, the might of force, the might of lasting, the might of immensity.

To love the World

To love, to accept the World is very difficult, because consciously, subconsciously, half-consciously we used to see it as our adversary that confronts us, and that must be overcome, defeated, converted. We are proud of any victory in this fight, we mark the history of the human civilization by those victories. Well, it might be just fine towards the civilization, but, towards the inner reality of a man, those victories win nothing, they do not remove the contradiction, they do not make our relations with the World into relations of love.

To love - is to surrender, is to remove the distance. Love, first of all is in the absence of the distance, explicit or implicit. To take away the distance, to allow the World to exist within oneself, and to allow oneself to be in the World - this is the true deed of spiritual love.

This love is hard. It is hard, because one must come to love endlessness. One must stop seeing the World as one's adversary. One must try to see its beauty, one must view it with the lover's eyes. But it is very hard. Me - a speck on a grain of sand, lost in the vast Universe. And the World - self-sufficient, nothing to do with me, that has been fought against for the whole history of humanity. A mixture of good and evil, untameness of Nature, uncognizability of social life, something that cannot be counted or controlled, something called the World. Not a slice that is cut according to our tastes, but the world as it is!

But look at ourselves, impartially, and you will see the same kind of monster. The same mixture of good and evil, the same untameness of nature, the same lack of social control. But just try and look at each other with lover's eyes, and then something happens, something that was spoken, dreamt of, sought by the great mystics of all times and people.

So what gets changed, then? What really, practically gets changed? Before everything else, pettiness and psychological rush disappear.

Why does it disappear? Because there emerges an understanding and feeling of necessity and sufficiency of all things in your personal existence. Now you perceive, experience and comprehend such things as pain, suffering, fear, joy, happiness, bliss in a very different manner than you did before. Everything is different. Different, because there is no need to fight against anything, to throw away anything. And if there is a desire to change anything, you already have the inner knowledge, that it is only possible by changing the relations between you and the World.

Spirituality is work

Such an event does not lead to blessed pseudo-prosperity, that is, to the vacation, as it is often subconsciously desired by many. And the rush for such a vacation is often marked as spiritual craving. A simple desire to have a rest from life's complications, is played off as longing for spirituality, and by the spirituality is termed a certain blissful state of well-deserved rest.

Spirituality is work, it is the work of love. Anyone who loved, knows that love is not rest. Love is an extreme straining of all feelings, thoughts, emotions. It is life in its fullness, and fullness cannot become rest. Fullness cannot give a feeling of effeteness. Although the experience of fullness of being gives the sensation of living in the whole of the World as in one's own home, and the sense of uncertainty disappears: am I there, am I where I should have been, is it the right epoch, are these right people? And does this sole personal life have any meaning at all, maybe I should think by packs of reincarnations at a time? As some people say, what's in this one live, just a few decades!

Relations with the World

It is well known that society always attempts to lock in each man inside of society in its rigid image. It is not accepted by society to have more than one image for its members, it immediately causes tension and low grades. But when a man "sticks to his image", for example, sticks to the same dress, same hairstyle, same facial expression, then he is a good man, and social "at-a-boy." It is quite natural, since society presses for an increase of the predictability level of its members. It is an indicative feature of the society mechanism. If a man does not realize the mechanism inside of which he lives, then he thinks that this is all right, and that he is what he is. Some people manage to keep this image, this costume, this facial expression even in the night. Just in case.

When a man choses a different type of relation with the World, and is able to implement it, he discovers his own manyfacetedness, his own flexibility. And then, "sticking to oneself" will be expressed in the realization of one's own multifacetedness to the largest extent. The man turns toward the World with his various sides, and, in response, the World turns toward the man with its various facets. Such a man does not change anything, but is himself changed.

When a man has such relations with the World, and with oneself, then, naturally, his relations with other people assume different qualities as well. He does not only see what is being stubbornly shoved to him, that is a certain fixed image of the other, for example, the other's such-ness, but he begins to recognize the potential spectrum of the other. Such a man is able to master a certain prescribed confrontational level, because he sees a multidimensional being, and it helps him to find some new ways to reach toward the other, he is able to find such ways of communication, that will negotiate the usual conflict. And, when addressing this multidimensional being, the man may assist in his awakening, and his recognition of this multidimensionality.

This is why it is said, the most spiritual thing that a spiritual man can do for others - is to be oneself. If it is part of his task to be oneself between people, without any disguise, it is a colossal work, because by his behavior, reactions, by his approaching others, he is constantly provoking around himself a different type of interaction with the World.

What can a man can do to prepare himself for such a meeting with the World, for such a type of relations?

All attempts of realization, all practices that target this problem are associated with the question who am I? Why is this question is so important? Because our "I" does not yield to rational conceptualization. Everything that may be said about "I" is I am, I am I. There is not any possibility to speculate about "I". This fact creates tremendous strain in our consciousness.

To relieve this strain, we begin to transform this pure "I" into something else, otherwise we feel somewhat unusual, inconvenient and uneasily. Indeed, any subject of society has biography, personal qualities, relations, and a level of intellect strongly tied to it. And it is somewhat awkward for such a person just to say to oneself, out of the blue: so why this bullshit all the time, if you could excuse my expression, all this pertains to "I" no more than a bottle pertains to the mineral water in it. Whatever you do, you cannot say anything about "I", save "I am I". Not only say, but even think. It is simply meaningless. Because what is the point to sit and - I am I, I am I, I am I, I am I. What is it? A contemplative process?

Therefore, a man never thinks of oneself in reality. In reality, he always thinks of someone's: of his own, of other's own, of girlfriend's own. For instance, he thinks of his body, of his personal problems, of his feelings, of someone else's wealth, of someone else's virtues, of someone else's success, of other's lands, and so on. It is a customary way of thinking, that there are very few people in this life, who, once, just dropped the pretense and ceased to imagine that "I" is something else besides "I".

And should you not move yourself toward this in any manner, then no love between you and the World could possibly happen. Because the kiss through the napkin feels very different then the intimate kiss. And the role of the napkin is played by everything that you consider yourself. All of it will get in between you and the World that you long to embrace. If it is not your body, but it is you; if it is not your thoughts, but really you, and so on. Now, could you imagine how much room is taken in between your "I" and the World. Somewhere there, at the horizons, there dwell They, Other, Stranger. And the World is even farther away. Because it is not enough to get rid of the fear of being "I", what is also needed is to get rid of the fear of being "not Us".

A man is a social creature, he is made out of people, therefore for most people the real content of "I" is "Us". Most of the time, people feel themselves only as a part of Us, and by themselves, they seem not to exist at all. But, of course, Us is not Them. Now you see? What World? What are you talking about? Do you see that there is no chance at all to reach to the World. What macrocosm, what Universe?!

So how is it possible to really break through all these barricades, castles, trenches, all that separate me from myself, not even mentioning the separation between me and the World? Indeed, it is not just rubbish that can be simply thrown into a garbage bag. All of it is the product of human evolution. These are amazing, beautiful things without which we would not become humans. And all those good, virtuous, high-grade gadgets must be given away. In the name of what?! In the name of some spook of spirituality?

It is only a man that came to this as a result of some shocking experience, who came to love the World, who does not have this question - to give away or not. He is a mad lover. Amok. Crazy Medjnun. He does not have problems. But then, he does not reason about spirituality. He exists there. He does not become either a doctor of philosophy or a master of tradition. He simply lives in this love of his. Is he lucky, is he unlucky - depends.

But us, so far we just keep arguing, and, as it may happen, will just go on with arguing. Maybe this love will not happen. So at least, let us argue with competence, honesty and consistency. And if we do it with competence, honesty and consistency, we will understand that this craving for drug-induced experiences - no matter what actually caused them - psychedelics or something under the name of "meditation", this craving all the same roots: a desire to go into a certain state and find there a certain experience of so called unity with Universe. And if one thinks of the reasons for such desire, one finds out that one simply cannot reach the Universe through all this company: "I", and then Us, and then Them..., thus the desire for the substitute.

Of course, on the "spiritual market" it is very fashionable. A good price is paid for, and it is always in high demand: drug-induced experiences, because they create an illusion of a direct contact with the Universe. It does not matter that it is only for fifteen minutes. Matters that it happened. The self-esteem jumps through the roof. It does not matter that nothing has changed in your real life. So what?! Now, what I just said doesn't mean that I deny ecstatic ways of cognition or ecstatic ways of interaction with the World. Ecstatic means and ecstatic states actually open up inner vision, but only if these states are born by love and heartthrob. Ecstatic perception of the world is not a technique, because the ultimate boundary of all techniques is love.

Any technique, any the most exquisite psycho-energetics practice is not love and cannot become love. Practice may refine your instruments, it may make a super-receiver with a colossal range and response level out of a primitive one. But any practice cannot become the content of the programs that this receiver picks up.

And if your practice attempts to substitute love, then the picture is like this: I transmit to myself, I receive the transmission from myself, and I wig out, also of myself. Are you laughing yet? Indeed, it's enough to make a cat laugh. I have seen enough people who understand the spiritual practice precisely as I have described. And not only understand, but, also practice it like that. Plenty of them. It is a very widespread mistake.

Spiritual practice requires time, patience, and a qualified instructor. And it is controllable.

But love - is a happening. It may or may not happen. There are people who are afraid of even warm affection, save a passionate love, or ardent love, or cosmic love. But, please, do not confuse it with "cosmic lovers", "cosmic brides", "voices" and so on. These two are very different things. Although the latter also exist.

Psychological instruments

A man in the course of his history, accumulates and creates a vast volume of various psychological instruments. In order to learn those instruments, in order to change from a subconscious to a conscious mode of usage, one needs time, effort and determination. A man must become interesting for oneself.

We only say that we are interested in ourselves. Actually, we are much more interested in our neighbors. What is for me in my own kitchen? I am much more interested in my neighbor's kitchen. In principle, both mine, and my neighbor's and my neighbor's neighbor's sets of psychological instruments are quite similar. Not really identical, but quite similar. And this helps, to an extent.

We are, indeed, all different, all unique, all in a class by ourselves, hand-made, yes, but - in a very different place. While in this mechanical life all of us are made by the same blueprints. And therefore, by discovering one's own typical, one strengthen one's uniqueness, and by discovering one's uniqueness one strengthen one's typical. Because the thing that is discovering, is the thing that become stronger.

It is long uphill way - to know one's farmstead, time and patience is required to puzzle out all these instruments, that we are confusing with ourselves. And, generally speaking, it is all right, that the majority of people does not even attempt to do that. It is all right, unless the man has a desire to partake another life, not after we are dead and buried, but today.

As soon as a desire to partake another life under the name of "spirituality" appears, there also appears the task: to know oneself as a product. Because one cannot build a spiritual life unless one's "I" and one's incarnation are clearly separated. To know one's incarnation, to make it one's farmstead, it all requires a Master, a pure subject, "I". In this great simplicity lie both great wisdom and great complexity. All this vast farmstead under the name of incarnation is managed by a seemingly simple thing: I am I. On this single cornerstone all the colossal temple is built - the Human.

The closer to the truth, the more power

Coming closer to this pin-point self-awareness (I am I) , coming closer to this point in self-realization, you become stronger and more powerful, more diversified and more pliant. Your perception is more refined. But remember this - the greater the sensitivity, the stronger the pain. Do not ever forget it, otherwise you will be greatly frustrated.

There is a golden rule of everything living: the greater the sensitivity, the sooner pain comes. And this transition to a pointed self-awareness increases the sensitivity, and, thus, lowers the pain threshold. But, at the same time, the power, your inner power increases, the closer you come toward this marvelous simplicity. This is indeed the point enclosing the infinity, this is indeed the great square that has no corners, it is indeed Nirvana is the same as Sansara, and Sansara is the same as Nirvana. And it is the greatest lightness of the flight. Because I am I. It is indeed the deepest depth. This treasure is found in the very bottom of the mine of our consciousness. It needs to be dug out. I do not know about you, but I like it a lot: "I" playing on myself. There is "I" - the musician, there is my incarnation, my farmstead - the instrument, and there is music - sensible creative life, that is truly mine.